Lettuce be to thee...
12.12.07
As a parent I often find
myself in a dilemma when it comes to meal times since
apparently I’m supposed to encourage my children to eat
vegetables because they are so good for you.
The thing is, although I do eat some vegetables, there
are plenty I don’t and just won’t eat, so it becomes
kinda hypocritical of me to say make sure you eat up all
your greens if my plate is veggie free.
You may not be surprised to know then that as I was
growing up it was often said that I was a fussy eater.
This was then used as an explanation as to why I was so
skinny that, had you turned me sideways and got me to
stick my tongue out, I could have passed for a zip.
But there is a lot of misinformation doing the rounds
about vegetables and I think it’s time somebody umm...
spilled the beans. |
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For instance there’s the
whole carrot thing. How many of us when we were growing
up heard that carrots are good for you and they are good
for your eyes?
Well I have absolute proof that they are not – because
when I was growing up I tested this theory by sticking a
carrot in my brother’s eye once and he couldn’t see for
a week!
Funny thing is, I quite like carrots, but I have noticed
over the years that when it comes to vegetables, carrots
are always the first to come up!
Still, there are worse, like Brussels sprouts for
instance. These wee green balls are just nasty and I’m
convinced that they were developed for some means of
chemical warfare many hundreds of years ago.
And yet at this time of year people seem to mad for
them. It is as if Christmas wouldn’t be the same without
having them on the table.
If I’m asked now if I like Brussels sprouts I always
politely say yes, but if it is ever noticed that I still
leave them all on my plate, I usually just add that I
don’t like them enough to actually eat them.
And anyway I’ve been wondering about this whole eating
vegetables thing because they don’t seem to have anyone
fighting on their behalf.
And let’s face it folks, eating vegetables has to be
worse than eating meat because when you think about it,
at least the animals have some chance of running away!
The poor old veggies stand no chance and how do we know
that they don’t have feelings?
I mean in the vegetable world we know that corn has
ears, potatoes have eyes and beanstalk.
And of course cabbages have hearts and not only do
lettuce have heads, we have all heard over the years -
lettuce pray.
In fact I’m pretty certain they even mourn their dead
and when a cauliflower died once there was a large
turnip at the funeral.
All that said we’re still being urged to eat these poor
wee critters and still being told that they are really
good for us. |
In fact, to make them sound
even better for us we’re now being sold not just any old
plain vegetables, we can even eat organic vegetables –
which apparently are even better for us.
But I’ve made up my mind that it’s just wrong to eat
these vegetables even if I do occasionally have to buy
them for my other half.
In fact just last week I stopped at an organic vegetable
stall to get some.
“I don’t really eat vegetables. These are for my wife –
have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?” I
asked the stall owner.
“No,” he said...”you’ll have to do that yourself!” |
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A DROP OF
PORTER is
the weekly
column of
Inishowen
Independent
editor,
Liam Porter. |
|
