Bank holidays don’t add up 16.04.09
I don’t think there should
be bank holidays any more. I know, I know, there will be
people reading this going - what? Are you mad, man?
Maybe I am, but seriously folks, why should there be
bank holidays?
I mean shouldn’t the bank people be working every
goddamn minute there is to try and rectify the situation
they have helped put the country in.
Bad enough that they’re being bailed out time and again
without rewarding them with a holiday too.
I could never figure out what was so special about the
banks anyway. You know, why if they were taking a
holiday, should other people have to get the day off
too.
I say other people because in my chosen profession I’ve
never seemed to manage to get bank holidays off and yes
folks, I am slightly jealous. |
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Did I say slightly jealous,
I meant very jealous.
But, before you get me wrong, I’m not opposed to
holidays, I’m just opposed to the bank holiday idea.
Maybe it wouldn’t irk me as much if they weren’t called
bank holidays. But I’m not sure if there’s another
profession we could have them named after.
I mean I’m not sure that people would be overthrilled if
they were called, say ‘politicians holidays.’
Or maybe they would, because that might mean we’d have a
lot more of them in the year.
Come to think of it, if they were called ‘teachers’
holidays’ the same might apply.
So what profession could we name these elusive holidays
after?
We can’t call them a busman’s holiday, for the same
reason as newspaper workers, because the poor oul busman
often has to work driving people around who are off for
the day.
Anyway I don’t think people would like it called ‘busman
holiday’ because they might get fed up waiting for it to
come.
And I don’t think the sense of anticipation for the
holiday weekend would be as great if it was a ‘refuse
collector holiday,’ because people might just think the
weekend would be rubbish.
And, perhaps excluding myself, people genuinely do seem
to look forward to these weekends.
With that in mind I was wondering if there wasn’t though
a more appropriate occupation we could choose that would
reflect this.
Like for instance, we might call them ‘dentist holiday’
because it would mean a few days where people would not
be looking down in the mouth.
Or what about calling it a ‘quiltmakers’ holiday,’ so
people could look forward to it and associate the few
days off work with somebody who wouldn’t be feeling
‘down’ for a few days! |
Instead we get holidays
called bank holidays and, while it might have been valid
at one time, I think it doesn’t add up any more.
And I can think of about 90 billion reasons why it
doesn’t add up, but hey who am I to question these
things? Well I don’t care whether I should be
questioning this or not, I’m still going to do it.
In fact I’m half thinking about starting a campaign to
get the name changed if I can.
At the minute I think I’ve settled on ‘astronaut
holiday,’ but I’m not really sure if it’ll take off… |
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A DROP OF
PORTER is
the weekly
column of
Inishowen
Independent
editor,
Liam Porter. |
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